Category Archives: Global Warming

R.I.P. NASA– You Will Be Missed

I can’t believe this crap!  Okay, yes I can, but it still makes me sick.  Not only is this moron in the Oval Office (who shall remain nameless) trying to make us pay for everything from his ridiculous Cap-and Trade nonsense to healthcare for people in other states but now he is destroying what I consider to be one of the few worthwhile government institutions, one of the only ones (other than the military) which I might willingly pay for with my own money, NASA.

He is nixing the entire Constellation program; the only real hope we have of manned space-flight in the future since we have now decided to retire the existing space shuttle.  No more lunar-landers, no more moon bases for blasting terrorists from space and essentially no more NASA as we currently know it.  Space technology is not something you step away from for a few years to save some quick cash and then come back to when your student loans have been paid off.  If we do this now, we will never lead the way in this field again.

I did take a moment to think about this and say, “Well, with all the recent giant leaps forward in space flight from private companies, wouldn’t it actually make sense to turn our nation’s future extra-terrestrial ambitions over to the private sector,” and that might not be a bad idea but we are not there yet and I think we all know quite well that this means our future in space is going to be in the hands of the Russians and possibly the Chinese.  There’s a bright prospect!  The lives of our astronauts will now be entirely in the hands of a bunch of vodka-swigging commies who cannot even build an airplane that doesn’t burst into flames as the wings fall off upon leaving the runway.

Yes ma'am, it is technically strong enough to fuel our rockets... but what would we drink then?

That’s not the kicker though.  I was already incensed enough when I got to our socialist savior’s next plan for my beloved space agency.  “…the White House will direct NASA to concentrate on Earth-science projects — principally, researching and monitoring climate change.”  AHHHH!  No! No! NO!!!  He is turning NASA into some inane bullshit think-tank so that the government can just create their own ‘data’ to support global warming without needing the UN to do it for them.  I give it two years before Al Gore is running things in Houston and we decide that we cannot even permit ourselves to hitch a ride to the ISS with the Ruskies because their shuttles are powered by highly-combustible fuel rather than rainbows and puppy-dog smiles.  Their going to start making the Tang from ground up algae powder and turn the freeze-dried meals into some gluten-free crap grown by a 3rd-world slave-driver who never passes one iota of his massive boosts in sale price along to the poor saps working the fields.

I thought we were all doomed down here on Earth already.  I thought our decades of free-wheeling, gas-guzzling, fancy-free living had already done so much irreparable damage to our planet that the Himalayan glaciers would be gone in 20 years and we would all be sinking into our respective watery graves like so many polar bears searching for their long-lost ice-floats.  If things are so bad down here, shouldn’t we be focusing our efforts ‘out there’?  Putting solar blockers in place, creating an artificial ozone, finding a new planet to colonize?  We all saw Moonraker, we can do this people!

I can’t take it anymore!  Somebody needs to derail this ‘good-intentions’ train that the world is on and get back to reality.  Wake up, you morons, the concept of ‘best intentions’ has no more place in the world of government than non-data-driven hypotheses has in the scientific community.

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Al Gore: Savior To His Own World

It seems that Al Gore has had a real solution to global warming all along. All the doubts I have had hearing these speeches about how we need to save the Earth so our children’s children’s children’s what-have-you will not have to live in a rotting cesspool of a planet; Gore really did have a plan all along. A brilliant one at that!

We don’t need to save the glaciers… or the rain-forests. We don’t need to cut down on Styrofoam use and CFCs… or even buy those hybrid-vehicles which make their owner’s feel that warm sense of self-worth all over. All we need to do to save our future generations the pain of living in a polluted world of sweeping planetary warming and ice ages is to ensure that these future generations never come to be. And how do we do that, you ask? Simple…

Mr. Gore has taken the approach of spending his son’s formative years battling for his own unachieved political greatness and, failing in that endeavor, sinking into a slow mental and physical descent of increasingly crazy doomsday theories and general obesity. The result: a son who was just plead guilty to possession of marijuana and several other illicit substances. Of course the most remarkable aspect of Al-3’s little drug-binge was that the cops found his stash in his car when he was pulled over, on the Fourth of July, doing 100-mph in his Toyota Prius. (That’s not a joke; read the article.) I’ve never driven a Prius personally (I’m a man afterall) but I am guessing that young Mr. Gore may have slipped his little Toyota a few of his uppers to achieve that speed.

I suppose we will soon see just how stalwart is the resolve of elder Gore’s now that his son so clearly needs some parental guidance in his life. Afterall, in the House of Gore, this little slip-up goes much deeper than a narcotics charge. If Gore III is smoking anything, just think how that is increasing his carbon footprint. Open flames, butane lighters, burning plants! This kid might as well be slashing and burning his own personal rain-forest every time he lights up (and I doubt that the Earth-friendly Prius is achieving peak fuel-efficiency pulling 100-mph.)

ag3.jpg

Al “Tokyo Drift” Gore III

How are so many people blind to the overt hypocrisy in man’s attempt to negate his own planetary impact by taking even greater strides into the scientific unknown? If you honestly believe that mankind’s ‘carbon footprint’ over the past few thousand years has had that great of an impact on a global scale then how do you justify grandiose attempts to blanket the ice caps, churn the seas, and change to new fuel sources overnight? If we have really set our own planet on the path to a new cycle of warming and cooling (as it has gone through before) then humans have merely played their role in another chapter of Earth’s existence and, whether our species survives or not, our planet has a far greater ability to achieve homeostasis than we have to off-set it.

I am not saying that we, as a species, should uniformly turn into the Armageddon skid ag2.jpgand torch our world beyond recognition like so many thousands of parked cars into the Paris night. If we do, mankind will undoubtedly destroy itself in record time. But does anyone really believe that the answers to the vast mysteries of Earth’s climatological ebbs and flows are going to be spewed from the mouth of this guy?

Al Gore talks a good game about saving the world for our children’s children but that it not his real interest. This is a man who, after failing in his quest for the Presidency, has consistently used his political clout to establish himself as a leader in an already growing social movement, thereby maintaining some pathetic grasp on his dwindling time in the social spotlight. Mr. Gore, after seeing his little moment at Live Earth, appears far more interested in saving his own place in the world epic than he does in saving the world itself. The only future generations Al is interested in seeing are those who will erect monuments to his greatness.

(footnote: This article is tagged ‘internet’ due to Al Gore having invented the internet.)