Not to Belittle the Dead But…

…that is exactly what I am about to do.

Some graduate student in England (not that we should hold that against him) recently killed himself playing a drinking game.  Get this, he and his “mates” were mimicking a game which they first saw being played in the movie ‘American Pie Presents: The Naked Mile.’  How much of a loser do you have to be to attend graduate school and yet also not only watch an idiotic movie like that but attempt to recreate it as well?

I clicked on the article about this guy because the link said something about a student dying from an ‘American Pie’ drinking game.  I thought to myself, I don’t even recall the characters in ‘American Pie’ playing any drinking games but apparently I had forgotten that I saw the original movie and, unfortunately, the sequel as well.  I did not, however, see any of the endless parade of other spin-offs that followed.  I thought about going to see ‘American Wedding’ briefly but then realized that there was no need to go spend $15 at the movie theater when I could just beat my head against the wall at home and achieve the same sensation as I would watching that film.  They should make warning labels for movies that bad.

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Why Eugene Levy has shackled his career to so many of these movies is beyond me (… oh wait, money.  I forgot.)  Either way, its a good thing that, as a Jew, you do not believe in Hell, Mr. Levy, because if you were a Catholic I am certain the Pope would have damned you to there long ago for your role in the perpetuation of the ‘American Pie’ series of films.

The father of the young man who died was quoted as saying, “Every shot that David took was like another bullet.”  It was?  That seems like a pretty poor comparison.  I mean, was this kid a complete light-weight or something?  If I take six shots of tequila I will be pretty intoxicated but still able to function; if someone were to unload a .38 revolver into my gut I think I would probably be in markedly worse shape.

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